Lester Burnham / Fragile Future

Ever thought about the future but not about your job/career. But of your family, friends, & potential loves this may sound weird, corny and even normal. I dream of keeping and finding passionate people without to much ignorance and arrogance in them, good people with a great sense of experiencing life without letting discovery become a selfish game. I know people are flawed and aren't perfect. I want some life, a pulse sort of to run through me and I don't mean a thrill like skydiving or anything like that it's not for me. I write this in not a sad state of mind but not a happy state of mind either. I guess it's wishful thinking and strange to write/think aswell.

I think of small pleasures I'd love in my lonely state of mind like an intimacy of laying in bed with a partner and being quiet or talking softly like a silly romance novel not even in touch but a connection that creates a spark. I guess I'm writing this in a weird way of rumination.

Anxiety can make you worry and scare you I fight it everyday. Being a go to guy can be a blessing and a curse especially when you try to open up to your close friends. Scared you can cause problems amongst friends and add friction. This post sounds sad but I don't mean for it to.

Usually I post music reflecting my post or what I'm listening to currently but instead. I'll post a closing scene from one of my favourite television shows "Six Feet Under" some of it isn't understandable to those who obviously haven't watched it. This scene is so moving it makes happy, sad, laugh, uplifted, depressed, curious. It brings me to tears of mixed emotions its just beautiful everytime I watch it SPOILERS AHEAD for those planning to watch it.

Everyone's Waiting (CLOSING SCENE) - Six Feet Under