Bodies / Cathedral Of Sleep / Silent Talking

Last few days I haven't been good I've sort solitude in my bed staring at a wall thinking about how I fuck things up how no one would want me or look at me. Regretting vulgar attitudes I use to feel like I can fit in when really I'm acting like a dick no one would ever want to me be with. I feel really uncomfortable most of the time feeling like I never pull my weight but have no energy to do anything. I tell myself I'm going to do this, this, and... this. The time comes and I just leave myself to sleep.

I try to think of ways to break my routine with love/relationships/sex whatever the fuck people call it I don't care anymore I just want a hug its always the same things I always say or think.

http://thelandofhumor.com/pic/1060/products/1058Damn,%20Not%20The%20Friend%20Zone%20Again...jpg

   

Blog posts are the same. I ruminate in a shitty negative abyss. Alone, feeling selfish, alienated, like I don't belong anywhere lost wondering around in life comparing ideals or what society wants me to be which I do a lot sometimes taking on pressures of what how I should be and act. Scared. Everyday I wait and wait for someone to have a go at me yell telling me to fuck off your being a cunt, bringing people down, you don't have problems, cheer up. I'm going to bed to cry wait for people to abuse me tomorrow the usual or something to kick me...it's been a while I'm due for something.....*sigh*

 A Drowning - How To Destroy Angels - How To Destroy Angels (Self Titled EP)