Scenes From A Memory / Freeze Dry Seal

Shaking and its my fault damn my memory grrrrr........ Tomorrow will be fun :/ zombie like and all. Feel empty like I'm missing something. Losing friends because of this shell I've formed around myself... I ruminate my head pounds in a physical and emotional way. I feel lonely but don't I guess. I don't know how I feel to describe it feel I threw away things I shouldn't feel bad about I look back at decisions I've made to make myself to be that "good/nice guy", "pushover", "victim". All words I've always been called by friends, strangers, family, work colleagues.

Would my life be better with no one in it...in a bubble sometimes I wonder if I was brought up not knowing a soul and walking around an empty world with the same luxuries. I see idiots online complain about their amazing lives while people I know suffer. I feel like living a lie has more positives than negatives maybe I should have kept my mouth shut with everything in my life others could do without my dumb opinions.

Slow Chemical - Finger Eleven - The Punisher Soundtrack